Chapter 67: "The Return of the Chicken Clan: Fowl Play Unleashed!"

The crew had barely escaped Waifu Island's ridiculous antics when the clucking began.

Kazuya sat on the deck of the boat, watching the horizon. The sea was calm, the breeze gentle, and for once, there was peace.

"Maybe things will finally settle down," he muttered to himself.

Then came the ominous cluck.

"CLUCK…CLUCK-CLUCK…"

Kazuya froze. His eyes darted toward Fergus, who was lying in a hammock with a ridiculous sunhat on.

"Did you hear that?" Kazuya whispered.

Fergus opened one eye lazily. "Hear what? The sound of tranquility? The lull of the sea? The distant call of—"

"CLUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!"

Kazuya jumped to his feet. "That!"

Nerissa climbed out of the cabin, rubbing her eyes. "What's all the yelling about?"

Before anyone could answer, a massive shadow appeared on the horizon. It was a fleet of chickens.

Yes, a fleet.

Giant chickens paddled through the water on makeshift rafts made of feathers and driftwood. Some wore pirate hats. Others had eyepatches and cutlasses.

Sylvara groaned. "Oh, for the love of the gods…"

Captain Clucksworth Returns

As the chicken fleet grew closer, a familiar face appeared.

It was none other than Captain Clucksworth — the infamous leader of the Chicken Clan — standing proudly at the helm of a raft made from a giant egg carton.

"Bawk! I told you we'd be back!" Captain Clucksworth squawked, twirling a feathered mustache. "Nobody crosses the Chicken Clan and gets away with it!"

Fergus clapped his hands together in glee. "Oh, hell yes! The chickens are back!"

Nerissa sighed. "Why do these birds keep showing up?"

Sylvara pinched the bridge of her nose. "Because we can't seem to go five minutes without triggering some sort of ancient curse or chicken-related vendetta."

Kazuya threw his hands in the air. "We didn't even do anything to the Chicken Clan! Why are they still after us?"

Captain Clucksworth pointed a wing at him. "Don't play innocent, boy! You stole the sacred egg of prophecy!"

Kazuya blinked. "Wait, what? We didn't steal any egg!"

The chicken captain cackled. "Then why do you have this?!" He held up a shiny golden egg that glowed with an ethereal light.

Fergus squinted. "Wait a second… isn't that just one of those decorative Fabergé eggs?"

"NO!" Captain Clucksworth roared. "It's the Egg of Eternal Cluckery!"

 The Chicken Clan Attacks

Without warning, the chickens launched their attack.

Eggs rained down from the sky, splattering the boat with yolk. One particularly large chicken flapped its wings and dive-bombed Fergus, knocking him into the water.

"Retreat! Retreat!" Fergus yelled, paddling back toward the boat. "These chickens are crazy!"

Sylvara summoned a magical shield to block the incoming eggs. "We need a plan. Fast."

Kazuya grabbed a frying pan from the galley. "Plan? I've got a plan."

Nerissa frowned. "What are you going to do with that?"

Kazuya grinned. "We're making omelets."

 The Great Egg War

What followed was a battle of epic proportions.

Kazuya wielded his frying pan like a sword, deflecting eggs left and right. Sylvara cast fireballs that exploded in bursts of feathers. Nerissa summoned a giant tidal wave to knock the chicken rafts off course.

Fergus emerged from the water, holding a roasted drumstick. "I got one!"

"Fergus, that's disgusting!" Nerissa gagged.

"What? Waste not, want not."

Captain Clucksworth, meanwhile, was hopping mad.

"You think you can defeat the Chicken Clan?!" he squawked. "We are many! We are mighty! And we will not stop until—"

"BOCK!"

One of his chickens tripped and accidentally sent the captain flying into the ocean. He surfaced a moment later, sputtering.

"Curse you, gravity!"

 The Final Showdown

As the battle reached its climax, Kazuya and Captain Clucksworth faced off.

"This ends now, Clucksworth," Kazuya said, brandishing his frying pan.

Clucksworth narrowed his eyes. "You'll never defeat me, boy. I've trained in the ancient art of egg fu."

"Egg fu?" Kazuya deadpanned.

Clucksworth demonstrated a series of elaborate kung-fu moves, complete with chicken sound effects.

"BAWK-BAWK! HIYAAAA!"

Kazuya shook his head. "I can't believe I'm about to fight a chicken pirate ninja."

Fergus, from the sidelines: "Bro, you're living the dream!"

With a battle cry, Kazuya charged forward, frying pan clashing against Clucksworth's feathered fists.

 Peace at Last?

After what felt like hours of fighting, the Chicken Clan finally retreated.

Captain Clucksworth, now soaked and featherless, gave one final glare. "You may have won this battle… but the war is far from over!"

As the chicken fleet paddled away, Kazuya collapsed on the deck, exhausted.

Nerissa sat beside him. "Well… that was something."

Sylvara smirked. "You say that like this is unusual."

Fergus laughed. "I'll be honest — that was the best day of my life."

Kazuya groaned. "Can we please go one day without some kind of ridiculous adventure?"

Just then, a mysterious bottle floated up to the boat. Inside was a note.

Sylvara picked it up, reading aloud: "Beware… the Duck Dynasty."

Kazuya's eyes widened in horror. "Oh, come on!"