Chapter 93: “Bird King Blunders: The Fowl Kingdom’s New Ruler”
Kazuya stood awkwardly in front of a massive crowd of birds—chickens, ducks, geese, pigeons, and even a majestic peacock that looked ready to throw shade at anyone who dared step too close. All of them stared at him with expectant beady eyes, waiting for their new king to address them.
"Why do I feel like I've accidentally signed up to babysit a very feathery cult?" Kazuya whispered to Sylvara.
"Because you have, Your Royal Cluckiness," she teased, adjusting the Feathered Crown on his head, which was slightly too big and kept sliding down over his eyes.
A regal-looking rooster with a monocle and a tiny bird-sized cape stepped forward and cleared his throat dramatically.
"Greetings, Your Majesty. I am Sir Pecks-a-Lot, your royal advisor." He bowed deeply, though it looked more like he was about to fall flat on his beak.
"May I introduce you to the Royal Flock?"
Kazuya sighed.
"Do I have a choice?"
"Not really, sire."
The Royal Flock of Chaos
Sir Pecks-a-Lot began introducing the members of the Royal Flock.
"This is Duchess Quackington, the most influential duck in the Fowl Kingdom."
A very posh-looking duck waddled forward, wearing a tiny pearl necklace and a feathered hat.
"I do say, Your Majesty, it is a delight to finally meet the legendary Bird King," she quacked with a ridiculous upper-class accent.
Kazuya leaned toward Fergus and whispered,
"She sounds like she's about to invite us to a fancy tea party."
Fergus grinned.
"Don't be fooled. Ducks like her will steal your bread the second you turn your back."
Next, a pigeon wearing aviator goggles strutted forward.
"I'm Captain Coo, head of the Sky Patrol," he cooed proudly.
"We keep the skies safe from… intruders."
"By 'intruders,' do you mean other birds?" Kazuya asked.
Captain Coo shook his head.
"No. We mean statues. Evil, bird-hating statues."
"Right. Of course." Kazuya pinched the bridge of his nose.
"This is my life now."
Feathered Fan Service
As the introductions continued, a flock of hens wearing frilly dresses gathered around Kazuya, giggling and fanning themselves with tiny feather fans.
"Oh my, it's the Bird King himself!" one hen swooned.
"He's even more handsome in person!"
Kazuya blushed furiously.
"Uhhh… thanks?"
"Do you think he's single?" another hen whispered.
Sylvara stepped in between them, her eyes narrowing dangerously.
"Back off, ladies. He's spoken for."
"Ohhh, someone's jealous," Fergus teased.
"Careful, Sylvara. You might ruffle a few feathers."
Sylvara gave him a withering look.
"Do you want to be pecked to death by a flock of angry hens, Fergus? Because that can be arranged."
"Point taken." Fergus backed off, chuckling.
The "Peck-idential" Meeting
Sir Pecks-a-Lot led Kazuya to a round table made of birdseed, where a group of feathered diplomats waited to discuss important matters of state.
"First on the agenda: The Great Bread Crisis," Sir Pecks-a-Lot announced.
"There's been a severe shortage of breadcrumbs in the Fowl Kingdom. The pigeons are rioting."
Kazuya blinked.
"You're telling me there's a bread shortage in a world that literally has a place called Brioche Island?"
"Yes, sire. It's quite the conundrum."
Captain Coo slammed his wing on the table.
"We must act fast! Without bread, the pigeons will turn to… less honorable methods of sustenance."
"Less honorable?" Sylvara asked.
"Garbage," Captain Coo said darkly.
"Pure, unsorted garbage."
"Oh, the horror," Fergus deadpanned.
An Unwanted Declaration
Just as the meeting was about to wrap up, a messenger dove burst into the room, flapping his wings frantically.
"Your Majesty! Urgent news from the Chicken Clan!"
"What now?" Kazuya groaned.
The messenger took a deep breath.
"They've declared you their new deity."
Silence fell over the room.
"Wait… WHAT?!" Kazuya nearly fell out of his chair.
"They've started a religion in your name. They're calling it… Cluckism."
Sylvara snorted with laughter, unable to hold it in anymore.
"You're a god now, Kazuya."
Fergus grinned.
"Does that make me a disciple?"
Kazuya buried his face in his hands.
"This can't be happening."
The messenger continued.
"They've already built a temple. They're holding a festival in your honor tomorrow."
"What kind of festival?" Kazuya asked cautiously.
"The Festival of Endless Pecking."
Kazuya's face turned pale.
"That sounds… horrifying."
The "Pecking" Order
As the festival preparations began, Kazuya found himself surrounded by chickens wearing ceremonial robes, each one bowing reverently as he passed.
"This is getting out of hand," he muttered.
Sylvara chuckled.
"Hey, at least they're not trying to sacrifice you."
"Yet," Fergus added ominously.
The Festival of Endless Pecking
The next day, the Festival of Endless Pecking began. The streets were filled with parades of chickens, giant feather floats, and bread-throwing contests. Everywhere Kazuya went, people chanted his name.
"All hail the Bird King!"
"Praise be to Kazuya, the Cluck-God!"
Kazuya stood on the main stage, holding up his hands for silence.
"Please… just call me Kazuya."
The crowd erupted into cheers.
"KAZUYA! KAZUYA! KAZUYA!"
As the sun set and the festival reached its climax, a giant statue of Kazuya made entirely of bread was unveiled.
Sylvara leaned in, whispering with a smirk.
"So… how does it feel to be worshipped?"
Kazuya sighed.
"Honestly? I just want some peace and quiet."
Fergus handed him a loaf of bread.
"Here. Break bread with your people, Your Majesty."
"If I break one more piece of bread today, I swear I'll lose it."
The chapter ended with Kazuya shaking his head in disbelief as fireworks shaped like chickens lit up the sky.
"This is my life now… and it's clucking ridiculous."