That time I was reincarnated as a snake (Tensura)

the snake 🐍 looks like a poop 💩 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 ...

here is my review, I've read 12 chapters of your story, and I have to say the concept is solid. Overall, it's a readable and enjoyable first novel. Mine was a disaster when I started, but that was mostly because I didn’t use any tools to improve. That said, I want to point out a few things that, if taken into account, could help you level up your writing. 1. Too much telling, not enough showing. You often state that an event happened without actually describing it. This makes the story feel bland. I’ve seen other authors get called out for the same thing—it’s a common issue, but improving it will make a big difference. 2. Avoid justifying what's good or bad. Sometimes, instead of letting the story unfold naturally, it feels like you're making a case for why something is good or bad. This can come off as ranting rather than storytelling, which breaks immersion. 3. Cut down on complaints. The MC constantly complains about how hard things are and compares himself to Rimuru. It makes him feel like he has an inferiority complex, which can get frustrating for the reader. If that’s intentional, that’s fine, but too much of it can drag the story down. 4. Overuse of fourth-wall breaks. Breaking the fourth wall can be fun, but doing it too often makes it lose its impact. Instead of being funny, it ends up feeling like something is smashing my head. These are the four major issues I noticed, though there are other smaller ones. But if I went into all of them, this would turn into a full-blown rant. That being said, improvement comes with time and practice. I’ve gone through it myself. I started writing a year ago in my free time, and I’ve seen progress. From my perspective, your story is already much better prepared than mine was when I first started—I just jumped into it on a whim. If you're interested, you can check out my story Survival in Akame ga Kill. It might seem cliché at first, but I’ve worked on upping my game. You can find the link in my profile. I hope you keep writing and improving. Maybe when your story reaches 100 chapters, I’ll come back and read it again. Best of luck!

going to make this boil up to like 50 chap then will come back

good story, good grammar and no harem. cant wait for more chapters

Love this story, one of my favorite thing about it is that the author use a wheel to randomize and this gives the storie some unpredictablilty which I love. Some thing that I would like to see happen is the mc have some more close bonds, the only one we have at the moment is Mira. The power scaling is good update schedule is steady so far. I’d suggest giving it a read

I have a question is this story going to be a harem?

Looking forward to the future of this novel

Good story so far, i want to see what happens next................................,........................................................................................

This is one of the best Tensura Fanfics there is together with I’m a daemon so what. It is not mainstream and has incredible potential so author please continue with such a good novel!!!!!!

I will be honest; it was kinda difficult for me to see the beginning drag out for long, stuck on the... let me term it as "goblin village arc." It was definitely interesting, but when that type of thing is stretched out for long, some readers may see it as "no development in the story building," like I did. Also, I remember seeing a comment about how the mc always complains about his level of strength and makes comparisons to Rimuru. Well, it's normal and all, but when it gets too much, some may find it annoying. I realized this problem in my own ff creation, something I'm working on. But I don't think I have a major problem with that. Well, those are the only problems I have with this story. In actuality, I appreciate this story a lot and hope to see the end of it. Please don't drop this ff.

This is a great fanfic, please don't stop writing

Gracias por traer semejante obra maestra a este sitio web en decadencia .......,,................................................[img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]

Reveal Spoiler

pls write as much as you can this is amazing. ..................................................................................................................