Happy Birthday, Hani (And Sorry for the Trauma)

The Arrival

Crimson and Kazuki strolled up to Kai's house, carrying a massive gift box between them.

"You think Hani will like this?" Kazuki asked.

Crimson grinned. "Bro, it's a flamethrower. Of course he'll like it."

Kazuki stopped walking. "Wait, what? I thought we got him a toy!"

Crimson blinked. "Oh. Oops."

Kazuki sighed. "This is why we don't go shopping unsupervised."

They reached the door and knocked. After a few seconds, Hani opened it.

"Uncle Crimson! Uncle Kaz!" the kid cheered.

Crimson ruffled his hair. "Sup, birthday boy! Where's your mom and dad?"

Hani shrugged. "In their bedroom."

Crimson and Kazuki exchanged a look.

"Thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?" Crimson muttered.

Kazuki nodded. "Kick. Down. The. Door."

A Door Was Harmed In The Making Of This Scene

BANG.

The door exploded open, hinges flying off.

Crimson and Kazuki stood in the doorway, silhouetted by the hallway light like action movie protagonists.

Then, they froze.

Kai and Nami were under the blanket, very clearly in the middle of something.

There was a long, painful silence.

Kai and Crimson locked eyes.

Not a single word was spoken.

Crimson very, very slowly reached for the doorknob and closed the door.

Kazuki and Crimson backed away.

"…We're gonna pretend we didn't see that," Kazuki muttered.

"…Agreed," Crimson said, his eye twitching.

Hani, completely innocent, tilted his head. "Why'd you guys close the door? Are they sleeping?"

Kazuki patted his head. "Sure, kid. They were just… wrestling."

Hani gasped. "Mom and Dad wrestle? Who won?!"

Crimson shuddered. "Your mom did."

Kazuki gagged. "Dude—why would you—why?!"

Crimson just shrugged.

The Celebration Begins (Like Nothing Happened)

An hour later, Kai and Nami walked out, looking completely normal.

"Hey guys!" Nami said cheerfully. "Glad you made it!"

Kai nodded, expression unreadable. "Yeah, good to see you."

Crimson and Kazuki just stared at them.

Silence.

More silence.

Then, Kazuki and Crimson both started wheezing.

Nami blinked. "What's so funny?"

Crimson wiped a tear from his eye. "Nothing, nothing, just… Happy Birthday, Hani!"

Kazuki, barely holding it together, muttered under his breath, "Round two must've been wild."

Kai threw a fork at him.

Enter Leon & MJ (And More Stupidity)

Just as things were settling, Leon and MJ kicked open the front door.

"WHERE'S THE BIRTHDAY BOY?!" Leon yelled.

"DO WE HAVE PERMISSION TO CAUSE CHAOS?!" MJ added.

Kai sighed. "Please. No."

Crimson grinned. "Permission granted."

Chaos. Ensued. Immediately.

• Leon gave Hani a slingshot, which was a mistake.

• MJ started a food fight within ten minutes.

• Crimson and Kazuki kept snickering every time they looked at Kai.

• Hani launched a cupcake into Kazuki's face and declared himself 'King of Sugarland.'

• Storm Eye stole a sandwich straight from Kai's plate.

Kai just sighed. "Why am I friends with you people?"

Nami, laughing, leaned on him. "Because we make life interesting."

Kai muttered, "Yeah, that's one way to put it."

The Aftermath

As the party died down and Hani was opening presents, Leon leaned over to Crimson.

"You guys were acting weird when we got here. What happened?"

Crimson smirked. "Kaz and I walked in on something."

Leon's eyes widened. "No way."

Kazuki nodded. "Yes way."

MJ grinned. "On Kai and Nami?"

"Yup."

Leon high-fived them. "Legendary."

Kai threw another fork.