Reverse Everything

After what felt like an extremely strange Thursday, I woke up the next day to the sound of Sky Burn again. I felt miffed that Woobin did not unblock me for the whole day the day before, but it didn't matter too much for now as Sky Burn was to have their regular gig today at a small club in Hongdae. 

Maybe this was what he was playing at?

Because I religiously follow his band and turn up at every gig, even if he blocks me on the phone it's a certainty that we will meet again at the club. Maybe that's why he kept up with his prank for two full days as he knew he could let me brood over it teasing me when we meet later today. 

Cruel. Cruel. 

But then again, whenever he plays some prank he'd burst out laughing at the end of it and I'd always forgive him, and my heart melt as I take in the sight of his childish smile each and every time. He certainly was a naughty child, but in those moments of his innocent laughter, it mostly felt like all the temporary anguish was worth it. 

I couldn't wait for the work to be over, but my seniors at work - especially Mr. Jin - had been acting extremely strange again. I spent yesterday nervous thinking maybe this was all an elaborate and carefully planned long setup to disarm me only to strike once I found my comfort zone, but now that it continued for two days I started to feel like maybe all these sudden positive vibes in the office was…real?

Nah-, I shouldn't be fooled so easily again. That always leads to more heartbreak and disappointment in the end. It's inevitable and I should know better.

At 8:30 PM, I was already well positioned at the very front row of the little live venue where Sky Burn was to play. This was my spot. Right at the center and as close as one can be to the stage. Being the lead singer and lead guitarist (how cool is that!) Woobin always stood at the center too, so this was the perfect spot for any fan of Woobin (and I wasn't gonna give up the position of being his number 1 fan any time soon). 

There were some other acts that came before Sun Burn. I was here to see Woobin's band really, but I always enjoyed small live clubs like this and getting to hear new bands that I've never heard of before. But of course, I waited in eager anticipation for Woobin to finally come onto the stage and see me so I could show him my best pout and frown - if I could hold back from just looking smitten that is. 

Then it finally happened. After this one band finished, the stage went dark. But since I was in the front row right by the stage I could see the members of Sun Burn come on. First the drummer, then the bassist, then the rhythm guitarist, then finally Woobin. He was then standing right in front of me, and even in the darkness, I could see the perfect silhouette of a man who had, well, a perfect body. 

Here I am in my little red cap

And I'm not so sure I can 

Hold it back and he

Looks around and then he

Finds me now so I

Let things be

Come and lay me down

Ah-, it was Little Red Cap, one of my favorite songs from Sun Burn and Woobin brought such a nice growl to this song. A good choice for the opening today, I thought. They sang the verses in the darkness, which really built up the tension and anticipation for the existing fans and intrigue for the people new to them, and as it hit the chorus the whole stage lit up and the crowd erupted into a loud scream and cheer. 

This axe is handy

And you were so dandy

Life will be boring without you

But I'd rather die than lose you

Lose you, My wolf

Mr. Wolf, my dear love

Woobin's sliver hair glowed under the spotlight with an almost ethereal feel to it, and his manly knuckles and forearms throbbed my heart with each stroke of his guitar. He wasn't muscular or a big man per se, but he was rather tall, had a lean build, and had the perfect shoulder breadth. 

I waved at him as he sang, and when his eyes met mine and gave me a wink my mind just went blank and totally forgot about how he blocked me and made me restless over the past two days. 

Well, I'll forgive him. As I always do. 

The rest of the gig just flew by and I was screaming and jumping up and down together with the crowd. I always felt a bit smug in these concerts because I felt a bit special that I knew Woobin personally, whom the fans in this crowd idolized. 

When the prepared set was over and the band left the stage, I quickly rushed to the backstage to meet my hero. It was a small venue for underground bands so there wasn't a security guarding it or anything, and the door to the band's waiting room was open so I just kinda barged in waving my hand.

"That was a great show, Woobin!"

As he heard me, Woobin looked up and beamed me a smile.

"Thank you."

Now that the show was over and I could talk to him again, it was time to give him some scolding.

"But it was so mean of you to block me! It wasn't funny!"

"Huh?" he responded as if he didn't know what was going on.

"Don't play dumb, hmph! I know you like these pranks but I really didn't find it funny this time."

"What are you talking about?"

To my surprise, there was a clear confusion on his face as if he really didn't know what I was talking about.

Was it an accident? Just a mis-click?

"Oh… sorry. Maybe you didn't mean it? You know, you blocked my number on your phone."

I was just a step away from him and I leaned forward to study his face - always a pleasure - as he sat and drank from a water bottle. 

That pulsing Adam's apple as he drinks…

"Well, I appreciate my fans, but I'm sorry. I have no clue what you are talking about."

He then got up from his seat, put his jacket on, and got ready to leave.

"Wait! Why are you doing this to me?"

I clung onto his sleeve and as he turned. I saw for a second that he was seriously annoyed, but he soon broke into what was clearly a forced smile.

"Thank you for coming to the show. But let's not be silly here."

He then put his hand on top of my head and ruffled my hair, which suddenly brought all the memories flowing back as he walked away leaving me behind.

I fell on my knees with my head in my hands, recalling the surreal moment when time stopped mid-air as the train approached me and I had a little conversation with God before having my life saved. 

Second Chance… Second chance…

and…re… reverse everything… 

But God… 

You didn't have to take it so LITERALLY!