Chapter 7

Chapter 7

After dinner we went to a nearby club. Zack asked me to dance. It was a fast one and I saw no problem, but the next one was a slow song. I stayed with Zack and we danced. He held me close and I held him. I have never felt so warm and comfortable. I liked what I was feeling.

We held each other close and I rested my head on his shoulder and pulled him to me. It felt so good and right. After the music stopped we went back to the others.

The silliness resumed. We left the club at a little after midnight. Amazingly, as I watched, Terry drank only sparkling water. He was the driver. For all the silliness they were responsible young men. I looked at them in an entirely different light. Zack was no longer the young student but a grown, responsible man as were Bobby and Terry.

As we left the club and went to their car, I could see that they didn't want to part. It was like watching a family being forced to go their own way. They all loved each other. They had a connection that I don't think anyone outside of the "Band of Brothers" could understand.

We said our goodbyes with hugs and kisses. It felt like I had known them for years. I hated to see them go. Just before they got into the car, Rachel and Miriam hugged me and Miriam smiled at me and said, "Listen, I don't know what to say. He loves you and I believe that you love him. I will pray for you. I will pray that you both will find happiness."

I just smiled and said, "Thank you, Miriam."

Rachel leaned over to me and giggled, "I am probably going to hate myself in the morning, and I would never say this if I wasn't drinking, but I hate the thought of you two not being together, give it some thought."

Miriam looked at her and gasped, "Rachel, how could you say that?"

Rachel laughed and said, "I have said it...but girl don't you ever tell me that you're not thinking the same thing."

Miriam just shook her head, "Maybe so, but I would never say it."

We had one more hug and they got into the car. Zack and I watched as they drove off. I felt sad at losing these new friends. We had exchanged e-mail addressed and had promised to write.

As we turned to go back to the hotel, Zack tripped over something (I have no idea what).

I grabbed him and kept him from falling. I took his hand in mine and said, "Tell me Zack, is it me or do you trip over everything."

Without missing a beat, he squeezed my hand and said, "It's you."

We walked the two blocks back to the hotel, hand in hand, in silence.

When we got back to the hotel we walked through to the lobby and into the elevator. When the elevator stopped at the seventh floor, Zack took me in his arms and he lowered his face to mine and kissed me. His lips were so soft on mine. They were warm and sweet. I liked it.

He pulled back from me. I looked into his eyes and I saw what I knew was love. Zachary, Zachary, Zachary Miller was in love with me.

I smiled at him and said, "Thank you for the perfect evening. I can't remember ever enjoying an evening more than I have tonight. Nor do I remember enjoying being with anyone so much."

Zack smiled at me and I turned and walked back to my room. I was walking on clouds, my head in the sky. As I undressed, I thought about the evening. This was dangerous territory. I was feeling things that I had never felt before. Things that a nun shouldn't allow herself to feel.

I got on my knees and prayed. I asked my Lord for help, that he help me deal with this temptation. This temptation that I really didn't want taken away. I asked for guidance, I needed to be shown what I should do.

Deep in my heart I knew what I should do. I knew that I should avoid Zack, I should avoid him like the plague. But, I also knew that I wouldn't. Would I be able to see Zack and avoid temptation? I prayed for strength. I fell asleep praying.

I awoke just as the sun started to come up. Once again I prayed. I showered, dressed and left my room to down to the hotel lobby. I walked two blocks to the Catholic Church, St. Sebastian's. I attended mass and again prayed for guidance. After mass I went back to the hotel and my room, again I prayed.

Around seven forty-five I left the room and went to the elevator, as I got onto the elevator, I heard a voice call, "Please hold the elevator." It was the conference coordinator, Margaret Zeigler. When she saw me her eyes lit up. "Oh Carol, I'm so glad I met you. You are the first speaker and I wanted to treat you to breakfast. Some of the other speakers will be meeting us down in the lobby and we are all going to have breakfast together."

"Thank you so much. That's nice of you."

We got off at the lobby and walked across to the restaurant. We met a group of people outside the restaurant and introductions were made. As Margaret was making the introductions, I looked into the restaurant and saw Zack sitting with a group of people. He looked at me and waved, I waved back.

We had breakfast with our respective groups and after we finished I was standing out in the lobby. Zack came up and gave me a slight hug.

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