Chapter 27 – This is So Damn Cringe
Why Am I Doing This Again?
As we sat at the cafeteria table, I couldn't help but think—
"This is so f*cking corny."
Seriously. I just walked up to the future villain and started acting like a friendly neighborhood NPC, throwing out casual life advice like some wise old sage.
It was cringe.
And I knew it.
The sword hummed in my mind.
"Hey, dumbass."
"What?" I muttered internally.
"You're aware this is dumb as hell, right?"
"Obviously."
"Then why are you still doing it?"
I sighed. "Because if she goes full 'evil princess mode,' we're all f*cked."
The sword chuckled. "And here I thought you just had a soft spot for lonely girls."
I nearly choked on my food.
"Shut the hell up."
---
Casual Conversation (Before It Gets Awkward)
I turned my attention back to the princess.
She was poking at her food, eating slowly, but at least she wasn't glaring at me anymore.
"So, uh…" I started, thinking of a topic. "What do you even do all day? Other than, y'know, being scary?"
She raised an eyebrow. "Scary?"
"Yeah. People practically run when they see you."
Her expression didn't change. "That is the result of my position."
I waved my hand. "Yeah, yeah, 'noble pride' and all that. But what do you actually do? Any hobbies? Do you knit? Read? Stare ominously at people?"
She blinked at me.
Then, for the first time, a small smirk appeared on her lips.
"…I fence."
I whistled. "Damn. That's kinda cool."
"I am the best in the academy."
I grinned. "Oh? Wanna test that?"
Her smirk grew. "You believe you can beat me?"
"Nah, I just like pissing people off."
She actually let out a quiet chuckle.
---
The Mood Suddenly Shifts
Things were going surprisingly smooth…
Until I asked the wrong question.
"So, what's your dream?"** I said, casually.
She froze.
The smirk was gone. The amusement in her eyes? Vanished.
For a moment, it was like she had shut down.
"Dream…?" she repeated.
I tilted my head. "Yeah. Y'know, something you want for yourself?"
She went silent.
The atmosphere around us suddenly felt heavy.
Like I had just touched a nerve I wasn't supposed to.
"…I do not have such a thing." she said finally, voice cold.
---
I Accidentally Hit the Core of the Problem
I frowned.
I wasn't an idiot. This wasn't normal.
She wasn't just "too busy" to have a dream.
She had never even thought about having one.
Which was… depressing.
I leaned back, sighing. "Damn. That's rough."
She glanced at me. "It is not necessary."
"Bullsh*t."
She blinked. "Excuse me?"
I shrugged. "What's the point of all this then?"
"This?"
"Yeah. The whole 'being perfect' thing." I gestured vaguely. "You're always top-ranked, never make mistakes, and people avoid you because they're scared of your family. But what do you actually want?"
She hesitated.
Like she didn't have an answer.
Because she didn't.
---
Giving Another Dumbass Life Lesson
I sighed, leaning forward.
"You know, you kinda remind me of someone."
She raised an eyebrow. "Who?"
I smirked. "Me."
She frowned. "You and I are nothing alike."
"Nah, we are. Or at least, we were." I looked up at the ceiling. "Before all this, I didn't have a dream either. I was just existing."
Her gaze sharpened. "And now?"
I grinned. "Now, I do whatever the hell I want."
She stared at me, waiting for me to continue.
I pointed a finger at her. "You should try it too."
Her eyes narrowed. "You are suggesting I simply… do as I please?"
"Yeah. Find something you actually care about. Not because of duty, or family, or whatever. Just for yourself."
She was silent.
Processing.
I shrugged. "It doesn't have to be anything big. Just start small. Try doing something that isn't 'expected' of you."
She stared at her food for a long time.
Then, very quietly, she muttered—
"…That sounds difficult."
---
Final Thought – Maybe I'm Not That Useless After All
Did I just make progress?
I wasn't sure.
But at the very least, she was thinking about it.
The sword snickered in my head. "Damn, you really love giving life advice, huh?"
"Shut up."
"I'm just saying, she looks way less depressed now."
I sighed, rubbing my temples.
This is gonna be a long f*cking mission.
---
To Be Continued…