Back Where the Chaos Begins

Ah yes, Sumeru City. The scent of scholarly ego, dusty scrolls, and overpriced street snacks greeted us like an old friend. And by old friend, I mean one that constantly makes you question your life choices.

"Man, it's so good to be back!" I stretched both arms to the sky dramatically, almost hitting a passing bird. It squawked in protest, clearly unimpressed by my return.

I glanced around like I expected wanted posters of my face to be plastered on every wall. "Surprised we didn't get any new wanted posters in this region yet," I said, only to get SMACKED by a certain violent blonde.

"Don't jinx it," Lumine warned, clinging to my arm again with the intensity of a bear trap—but like, a cute one.

I gave her a side glance, smirking. "So just to clarify, I'm not jinxing anything, alright? I'm just stating cold hard facts. You know, like how Mora disappears the moment Paimon spots a snack stall."

She didn't even look at me this time—just tightened her death grip and hissed, "Say one more stupid thing and you're jinxing our lives for real."

"Okay, okay! I take it back!" I laughed nervously, patting her arm like a hostage negotiating with his captor. "You can let go of the death gale now, Blondie."

"You're still not done with the clinging thing?" Paimon floated beside us, clearly baffled. "Paimon doesn't get you anymore. Seriously, how did we reach this point? Paimon is the only sane one remaining here!"

Greg, now perched on Lumine's shoulder like a reptilian warlord, flicked his tongue.

"Fine. You too, Greg. It's just you and Paimon now," she sighed dramatically.

"Greg has joined the cult of cling," I muttered. "We're unstoppable."

With our ridiculous squad assembled, we made our way to the Grand Bazaar. Or, as I like to call it, the Parade of Chaos and Glitter.

As we arrived, I squinted around. "Now, now... where did that pretty sickly lady go? I miss the polite one in this land of sass."

"There she is!" Paimon waved excitedly. "Dunyarzad, we're back!"

"Just as promised, Shigeru, Lumine, and Paimon! I'm so glad that you three came back to celebrate Lesser Lord Kusanali's birthday," she beamed.

"Looks like we made it back in time," Lumine smiled warmly. "It's a very important festival, after all."

"Hehe, indeed! The festival is tomorrow. We've been preparing for so long that I can't help but feel a little nervous."

"No need to be nervous," Paimon said with confidence for once. "Paimon's sure that Lesser Lord Kusanali will feel everyone's gratitude!"

"Thanks, Paimon. I hope that everyone who comes to the festival will also have a good time."

"Speaking of which," Dunyarzad continued, "did you manage to make your way to Port Ormos? Discover anything over there?"

"Of course we went!" Paimon puffed her chest. "A lot of things happened there..."

"Unfortunately, we didn't find any new info on Lesser Lord Kusanali," Lumine added. "Just more questions."

"More like more headache," I grumbled. "But hey, we found Greg. So not a complete L."

Greg hissed proudly, as if to say "Damn right."

"I see... Sounds like you three had another exciting adventure..." Dunyarzad giggled. "If there's another chance, I'd love to join—"

"Sigh My lady," came the gruff voice of Dehya from behind, "if you went to Port Ormos in your current state, we'd both be in for a lifetime of trouble."

Paimon floated up, frowning. "Dehya! You were eavesdropping again!"

"It's called covert protection," Dehya corrected with a smirk. "Keeping an ear out for what's going on around my employer is part of the job."

"It's alright, Dehya. I merely said that I would like to go. I know better than to think my body could handle it," Dunyarzad said, offering a calm smile.

"The festival's tomorrow. I've been nothing but trouble lately, so please, take some time to relax. I'll be fine."

Dehya crossed her arms, clearly unconvinced. "Even when you put it that way, it still doesn't feel right..."

"Don't worry, my guardian knight."

Dehya groaned. "Okay, fine. But only tonight. Tomorrow's a big day, and I guarantee there'll be plenty of scumbags lurking around."

Paimon let out an exaggerated yawn. 

"Yaaaawn… Oh, you three must be exhausted from your long journey back to the city. My apologies for not realizing this sooner." Dunyarzad said, "I've already prepared a room for you to rest. Please, follow me."

"Whoa, you're so thoughtful!" Paimon clapped her hands. "Paimon's so ready!"

We started walking behind Dunyarzad, and I mumbled to Lumine, "Our teapot is cozier. Should we just go back instead? I miss our lizard lord statue and that weird comfy fireplace."

Lumine gave me a stern look. "She went through all this trouble for us. It's just common courtesy to accept it."

I internally sighed. Well, she does make a point. I mean, I literally live in a fantasy teapot, who am I to complain about actual hospitality?

As we entered the room Dunyarzad prepared, I flopped onto the couch like a sack of regrets. Greg curled up beside me, licking his own eyeball like the gremlin he is.

"Yeah," I whispered, "this isn't so bad."

And so, we rest. For tomorrow… things will probably go to hell again. Just like always.

...But hey, at least we've got each other.

And Greg.

***

Morning light filtered into the room like that one responsible adult friend trying to wake you up for school. I groaned.

"Mmm... what a cozy bed," I mumbled as I stretched like a sleep-deprived starfish. "Ten out of ten. Buying one for the teapot. And another for Greg. So he stops sleeping on my face. Freaking cold-blooded menace."

Greg, already awake and licking a curtain like it owed him money, gave me an innocent blink. The tiny traitor.

Paimon floated up midair and stretched, rubbing her eyes with her little fists. "Did we oversleep? We should probably meet up with Dunyarzad. She's probably been waiting forever!"

I blinked slowly, still in a semi-dream state. "Dunyarzad... Right, the polite one. The one who doesn't threaten me with her blade when I breathe too loud. Got it."

Lumine was already halfway to the door, brushing her hair back. "Come on, you two. Let's not keep her waiting."

"Ugh, responsibility," I grunted. "Fine. But I'm taking another fruit on the way out. This place got Sunsettias? No? That's discrimination."

We strolled out into the warm Sumeru sunlight and made our way through the vibrant streets. The city was already buzzing with life. Music, laughter, weird hats—you know, the usual. I was still adjusting to the sunlight when I heard a familiar voice.

"Shigeru, Lumine, Paimon! I've been waiting for you three!" Dunyarzad greeted us with a bright smile.

"Good morning, Dunyarzad!" Paimon said, stretching with a sheepish grin. "We must've overslept a little bit, hehe."

"Not at all," she assured us. "I arrived early. Today is finally here! I must cherish every moment as if it were gold."

"You've worked so hard for this day," Lumine smiled. "You should enjoy it to the fullest."

"You know it! Although... I had a bit of trouble falling asleep last night. I'm hoping my body won't be too much of an issue today."

"Let's start with the stalls over there," Dunyarzad said, her eyes practically sparkling.

As we followed her into the colorful chaos of the Grand Bazaar, I whispered to Lumine, "Note to self, buy Greg a leash. This lizard has no chill. He nearly pickpocketed a merchant. With his tongue."

Greg hissed proudly and flexed like a tiny bodybuilder. No shame.

"Many vendors came out of the blue to support the event," Dunyarzad explained. "They even insisted on covering the costs themselves."

Paimon blinked. "They paid for everything out-of-pocket? Sounds like they're not in this just for the Mora."

"Either that, or they all lost a bet," I added. "Festivals are the best place to blow your life savings for clout."

We stopped by a stall covered in herbs, fruit, and way too many mushrooms.

"This is... a stall offering foods from the Haft-Mewa Feast," Dunyarzad said.

"Oh-ho, you could tell straight away!" the vendor Amal said. "Thought most people wouldn't know."

"Mushrooms, flowers, fruit... It's all vegetarian," Paimon muttered. "A little disappointing... but festive, I guess."

"Yep," I said, poking one with a stick. "Definitely not meat. Also might be sentient."

"If Sumeru uses veggies for the Dendro Archon," Paimon said thoughtfully, "then wouldn't the Pyro Archon's festival be full of roasted fowl, meatballs, and grilled steak?"

"Paimon's about to start drooling," I whispered.

"Lumine, Sigeru, we have to go to Natlan as soon as possible!" she declared.

"I swear," I muttered, "this entire journey's just one big food crawl with boss fights in between."

Next stall—alchemical divination. Because obviously.

"Would you like to try your hand at alchemical divination?" a vendor named Kimiya offered.

"Sounds like something that involves explosions," I said. "I'm in."

"You give me two reagents, I do a random transmutation, then I interpret the remnants," he explained.

"That's... oddly specific," Lumine said, squinting.

Paimon frowned. "Sounds like it'll just fail."

"That's the point," Kimiya said cheerfully.

"According to Lesser Lord Kusanali, everything is interconnected," Dunyarzad added. "This is wisdom passed down through generations."

I handed him two herbs I definitely didn't steal. "Alright, future me, don't embarrass me."

BOOM.

Smoke cleared. The result? A pile of glitter, some confetti, and what looked like a bent spoon doing the Macarena.

Kimiya examined it. "Ah yes. This means... you are chaotic but full of charm."

"Okay, that's suspiciously accurate. Who told you? Was it Paimon? I bet it was Paimon. No wait—was it Greg? Are you in cahoots with my lizard? That traitor's been suspiciously smug lately."

"Greg wants a turn," I said, shoving him forward. Greg headbutted the table.

Kimiya stared in horror. "I... I think he just invented cold-blooded prophecy."

Moving on—children chanting, "Farris! Farris!"

A man with a weird hat barked orders. "Atten-tion! Fall into formation if you want Yalda Candies!"

"Knight of Sugar Distribution," I mumbled. "Living the dream."

"Miss Dunyarzad!" the kids beamed.

"Farris, the Knight of Flowers," Dunyarzad explained. "A popular icon for children."

"Fitting," I muttered. "The hat says 'tax fraud,' but the kids love him."

Farris handed us candy boxes. "Pick a number between one and five!"

Paimon gasped. "Lumine, help me pick one!"

Lumine nodded. "Number four."

Sunsettia flavor.

"See? She's got luck stats maxed," I said. "Also probably cheats."

Paimon: "Thanks, Knight of Candies!"

Farris: "It's Knight of Flowers! Not Candies!"

"Your job title's already lost, my dude," I shrugged. "You're Candy Man now."

After more snacks, glitter, and emotional damage via spicy candy, Dunyarzad turned to us. "I just remembered I left something behind. Can you come with me to get it?"

"Sure," Lumine nodded. "Lead the way."

Paimon smiled. "You probably forgot because you're so excited about the Sabzeruz Festival!"

Dunyarzad giggled. "Haha, how embarrassing."

As we followed her again, I rubbed my belly. "If I eat one more thing, I'm gonna need to roll back to the teapot. Greg's gonna use me as a cushion again."

Greg responded by jumping onto my shoulder and licking my ear. No respect. None.

I looked around at the buzzing bazaar, the colors, the food, the chaos. I grinned. "You know what? Sumeru might be insane... but it's the good kind of insane. The food coma kind. The kind with glitter explosions and fake fortunes."

Greg burped. Probably in agreement.

I swear I saw him wink at a merchant. We're all doomed.

__________________________

End of Chapter 96

Quests Completed:

*Return to Sumeru City (Without getting new wanted posters)

* Meet up with Dunyarzad at the Grand Bazaar

*Listen to Dunyarzad's updates and festival plans

*Attend the opening of the Sabzeruz Festival

*Explore stalls with Dunyarzad

* Participate in alchemical divination

*Interrogate Farris the Candy Knight

*Don't burn down the Grand Bazaar (optional... but success!)

Rewards:

*Comfortable Rest (Fully restored HP)

*Festival Snack Pack (x3 Sunsettia Pastries, x1 Mystery Sandwich)

*Greg Cleaned Himself Today (Blessing of Fresh Lizard Scent: +2 Charisma)

*Box of Yalda Candies (flavor: ???)

*Alchemical Debris of Wisdom (not usable, but very glittery)

*+5 Festival Reputation with the Children of Sumeru (Didn't Traumatize them for once.

* Greg's Respect (temporary buff: +1 Confidence)

Achievements:

"Master of Fate"

– Fail a divination spectacularly and still walk away smug

"Lizard Language"

– Let Greg perform a prophetic headbutt on alchemical equipment