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Werewolves: The Apocalypse — The Book of Hungry Names
(Now with 98% more ecological guilt and 100% less graphics)

You and your band of traumatized werewolves (read: a group of poorly resolved furry therapists) must save the Living Earth using two infallible ingredients: homicidal rage and questionable spirituality.

In this interactive novel with hundreds of choices (most leading to inevitable doom), you'll have the chance to face a Wyrm Spirit that manifests itself as... a lie you really want to believe. Like that voice that says "I'll start my diet tomorrow." Only with more cosmic destruction.

 Written by Kyle Marquis and set in the wonderful (cough) universe of World of Darkness, this epic without a single image (but with 1.6 million words, in other words, an abusive relationship with reading) is fueled solely by the most powerful thing in the world: your imagination that has already failed three college entrance exams.

You are a werewolf. And like all good werewolf, you are a mix of:

Shaman who thinks meditation cures demonic migraines,

Hero that nobody asked for,

Monster with existential crises,

And sustainability consultant for Mother Gaia (bankrupt, of course).

Created by the goddess of the Earth, you were gifted with the ability to turn into a wolf (in other words, walk around naked with style), and tasked with the noble mission of preventing humanity from turning the planet into a cosmic McTrash.

But guess what? You failed. Congratulations.

 Three years ago, your pack was part of the Sept of Broad Brook, Massachusetts (land of maple syrup and spiritual doom), where werewolves still pretended they had a chance against the Wyrm — the spirit of destruction, chaos, and people who comment “first” on YouTube.

While other Septs fell like dominoes at a satanic rave, yours was there, firm, strong, and deluded. Some said you would prevent the Apocalypse. Others just thought it was funny to watch the circus burn.

Now, all that’s left is for you to pick up the pieces (literally), avoid becoming an evil spirit’s kibble, and, who knows, write your name in the Book of Hungry Names — the one that eats hopes, New Year’s promises, and happy endings.

Do you want me to adapt this to become the introduction to chapter 1 as well?

Of course! Here's a Desciclopédia-style warning, with a touch of acid and humor, that you can put at the beginning of your story on Wattpad to make everything clear:

WARNING BEFORE SOME LITIGIOUS SPIRIT COMES TO BARK

This work is a humorous reinterpretation (read: full of irony, sarcasm, dark humor and some inconvenient truths) based on the style of interactive stories like those from Choice of Games. But, before anyone calls the lawyers or invokes the spirit of copyright, let's make something VERY clear:

This is not plagiarism. It's parody. It's a joke. It's entertainment.

(And, let's be honest, not even Mother Gaia would bother to sue.)

The writing adopted follows the Desciclopédia style, that is:

Nothing is sacred.

Everything can be a joke.

If you get offended, congratulations, the system worked.

 This is a tongue-in-cheek homage to the classics of the genre, using the interactive format to tell stories that are bizarre, tragic, hilarious, and incredibly stupid (sometimes all at the same time). None of the original Choice of Games content was copied directly—only the structure was inspired, because let’s face it, reinventing the wheel is a lot of work.

If you want an epic journey with deep moral dilemmas, go play the original.

If you want to laugh at your own misfortune while turning into a werewolf and punching mystical capitalism with your paws, go ahead. It’s your house.

Zerk World) Zombo Stars

**"Wolf in SUV: The Escape (Or Not)"**

*Scene:* Two anthropomorphic wolves, you and Tiva, are in the middle of a Michael Bay-directed action movie mayhem after drinking three Red Bulls.

You approach Tiva like a drunken ninja cat, saving her from a human who thought it would be a good idea to stab an angry wolf in the back. Spoiler: it wasn't. With a nice *shoulder bash* followed by a *claw combo*, you turn the poor guy into a bloody potato sack and throw him to the ground like organic waste.

Tiva is panting, surrounded by four bodies that look like they've been through a blender. She chews on something suspicious—probably a piece of the last idiot who tried to confront her. *"Lapu played us like suckers,"* she growls, spitting a bit of *"bandit meat"* onto the asphalt.

You, ever the optimist, remind us: *"At least he warned us!"* (Because nothing says *"effective warning"* like *"hey, there's a few guys there, maybe one or two"* and in reality there are fifty of them armed to the teeth).

Tiva peers out the SUV window and sees the elders of the pack in a panic, fleeing the buses like it's Black Friday at the nearest meatpacking store. The humans, organized as if they were in an evil *call center*, surround the poor elderly wolves with weapons that would make Rambo weep with envy.

*"Let's get out of here,"* Tiva suggests, opening the car door like she's in *The Fast and the Furious: Furious Wolves*.

1. **"I'll drive!"** – You take the wheel and attempt a *Mad Max*-worthy getaway, ignoring that your driving skills are limited to crashing into trash cans in *GTA*.

2. **"She better drive."** – You throw yourself into the passenger seat, because Tiva clearly has the least moral authority not to *run over* the elders in desperation.

3. **"RAMMING SPEED!"** – You turn into *Dennis Hopper in Fast and Furious* and speed towards the humans, because *"dying trying"* sounds better than *"running away and living with the guilt"*.

*Choose wisely (or not, after all, wolves aren't exactly known for thinking before they act).* 🚗🐺💨

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