"The Trial of Hearts and Horns”
Volume 4: Heaven's Proposal: I Accidentally Got Engaged to an Angel and a Demon (At the Same Time)
Chapter 18: "The Trial of Hearts and Horns"
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Kai awoke to the scent of divine incense and demonic perfume wafting through the air like a declaration of war on his nose.
The bed beneath him was half wrapped in silk clouds, half draped in black velvet. Heaven and Hell still couldn't agree on interior design.
He sat up groggily.
"Good morning, my beloved," came two voices—one angelically soft, the other devilishly sultry.
He turned and nearly fell off the bed.
Lady Elyssaria stood by the window, brushing her platinum hair with a comb made of moonlight. A glowing breakfast tray hovered behind her.
Meanwhile, Duchess Malvexa lounged in a floating chair made of bone and fire, swirling a glass of hellwine. She wore a robe that somehow managed to be both modest and illegal.
"We've decided to settle this the old way," Malvexa purred.
Kai blinked. "Rock-paper-scissors?"
Elyssaria smiled. "A Trial of Hearts. A sacred duel of affection."
"...Is that a euphemism?"
"No," they said in unison.
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[System Notification]
You have been chosen as the Subject of Affectional Combat.
Rules:
Each bride candidate will have one day to express their love.
Emotional impact, intimacy, sincerity, and chaos will be scored.
The Glitched One must not interfere.
Winner gets full engagement privileges.
Refusal results in planetary collapse.
Would you like a bowl of popcorn? [Y/N]
Kai clicked [Y].
A bowl of popcorn manifested in his lap.
"I hate this system," he muttered through a mouthful.
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Day 1 – Elyssaria's Turn
It began with a picnic in the clouds.
Elyssaria brought him to a sky garden floating in the middle of a nebula. Birds of starlight sang overhead. Gravity was optional.
"This is... romantic," Kai admitted, trying not to float away.
Elyssaria smiled, offering him a slice of ambrosia cake.
"We angels don't often love... but when we do, it's with eternity in mind."
She knelt before him.
"I've studied your timeline, your tragedies, your fears. I don't just want to love you—I want to heal you."
Kai swallowed.
It wasn't the cake.
It was the way she looked at him like he was sacred.
She leaned forward, lips hovering inches from his.
Then—
"I've also filed for divine cohabitation permits."
Kai blinked. "What?"
She handed him a stack of scrolls.
"Once the paperwork is cleared, we can merge our celestial auras and officially date in the Fifth Dimensional Plane."
The mood shattered.
"Uh... maybe wait until after dessert?"
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System Update: Emotional Impact – 83%
Sincerity – 98%
Chaos – 2%
Kai's Confusion – 300%
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Day 2 – Malvexa's Turn
Her approach was different.
She summoned Kai to her personal hell-spa, where the lava was therapeutic and the towels screamed when you squeezed them.
"Relax," she said, slipping behind him. "Demons love with fire. And I intend to burn my name into your soul."
She massaged his shoulders. The tension he didn't know he was carrying turned to mist.
"You don't need to be sacred with me," she whispered. "You don't need to pretend."
She leaned in, tail wrapping loosely around his wrist.
"With me, you can be monstrous and divine. You can glitch all you want—I like broken things."
Kai stared at the lava pool.
He was way too relaxed.
Then Malvexa snapped her fingers.
A band started playing. Succubi in robes of red silk danced in synchronized rhythm.
A giant banner unfurled above: "MARRY ME OR ELSE <3"
Kai spat lava wine.
"I thought this was a calm date!"
Malvexa laughed. "Love is war, baby."
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System Update: Emotional Impact – 91%
Sincerity – 77%
Chaos – 94%
Kai's Confusion – ∞
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That Night
Kai sat alone in the merged suite, staring at the two rings on the table again.
Yui stood behind him.
"I don't trust either of them," she said.
Kai sighed. "They're both sincere... in their own warped way."
Yui leaned on the wall. "But only one of them knows your real fear."
Kai looked up.
"That you'll fall in love... and lose control."
He didn't answer.
She stepped closer, brushing a lock of hair from his forehead.
"You don't need to choose yet," she whispered. "Just don't lose yourself while they fight over your heart."
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The Next Morning – The Final Trial Begins
The courtroom returned, this time twice as full.
On one side: Elyssaria in full divine regalia, flanked by priestesses of purity.
On the other: Malvexa in ceremonial battle heels, backed by seductresses from seven hell dimensions.
Kai was once again put in the middle like a confused cake at a wedding buffet.
The judge—now twice as stressed—unfurled a golden scroll.
"Final question: Kai of the Glitched One... which heart will you claim?"
The room fell silent.
The rings floated before him.
One light.
One fire.
Both dangerous.
He stepped forward—
Then stopped.
"I... can't."
Gasps echoed through the cosmos.
Kai raised his head.
"I'm not ready to say yes to either of you. Not because I don't care—but because I do."
Elyssaria's eyes softened.
Malvexa's tail twitched.
"I'm broken," he continued. "My system glitches. My life is chaos. If I choose you now, I don't know if it's love... or fear. And that's not fair to either of you."
The judge frowned. "Refusal means—"
"I'm not refusing," Kai said. "I'm asking for time. And a real chance."
A new scroll materialized, glowing in glitchy text:
> New Path Detected: ERROR//LOVE(UNDEFINED)
Creating Route: "The Trial of Coexistence"
The courtroom glitched.
Everything shattered into light—
---
Kai woke up back in the real world.
Or close to it.
The world had shifted again.
Yui stood nearby, smirking. "You created a third route."
He groaned. "Did I glitch the marriage system?"
"Yep," Nyxa said, appearing with popcorn. "Now you get to date them both... with consequences."
Kai sat up, muttering.
"I should've picked the popcorn path."
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End of Chapter 18
📘 Up next: Chapter 19 – "Kiss, Kill, or Court – The Deadly Date Game"