Focus on, focus off

Over the next four days, Dae-jin focused entirely on himself. His days consisted of attending university and then continuing his usual delivery job after classes. For now, this routine gave him a sense of satisfaction for the rest of the week. There was so much to keep track of that even at home, he barely had time for anything other than showering and sleeping. 

His early morning runs or walks had become a part of his daily ritual – just a way to clear his head and sort through his thoughts. That's why he always woke up very early. You clould say he was determined when it came to protecting his own peace of mind. 

This morning began the same way. Dae-jin was startled awake by the unplesant sound of his alarm, which read 5:00 AM when he squinted at it and turned it off. He quickly jumped out of bed, washed his face, and got dressed. 

There weren't many people out on the streets at that hour. Just a few other joggers or people who took their pet for a walk crossed his path. With his earphones in, Dae-jin jogged along the edge of a nearby park. The weather was nice, though he still managed to work up a sweat. He never pused himself too hard – otherwise, he wouldn't make it through the day – but a part of him enjoyed this kind of freedom. Out there, it was just him and the music playing in his ears, which he had already replayed for the third time. 

Dae-jin hadn't heard much from Jae-hyun. At least, not directly. He was deliberately avoiding him at university. He didn't even give Jae-hyun a chance to speak. Whenever Jae-hyun got too close, Dae-jin would simply turn his back and walk away before the other could even open his mouth. 

The messages Jae-hyun sent met a similar fate. Dae-jin would read them, but never replied to any. Honestly, he didn't even know what to say. It wasn't his problem if the other guy was a jerk. 

At university, the atmosphere between Jae-hyun and Dae-jin grew heavier with each passing day. Jae-hyun couldn't seem to shake the feeling that he had to try harder to reach Dae-jin. Since the messages weren't working out anymore. 

One afternoon, as Dae-jin was walking alone across the campus courtyard, his earphones were in as always, as he focused about some upcoming test that day. But suddenly Jae-hyun stepped in front of him. 

- Hey, wait! - he called out, his voice was shaking a bit. 

Dae-jin paused, looked extremely annoyed then he removed one of his earphones slowly. 

- What you want? - he replied with a cold undertone. 

- I need to talk to you. Please, just for a minute. - Jae-hyun pleaded, his eyes searched Dae-jin's face for any sign of softness. 

But Dae-jin just stared at him with a hard expression. Then he just turned around and started to walk away. He didn't want to hear anything. Besides he heard a lost of things already in Jae-hyun's head. He was afraid if he actually talks to him that would made him change his mind. So he just left. 

- Don't just ignore me..- Jae-hyun shouted after him. 

Dae-jin didn't look back. His heart was filled with confusion and a bunch of conflicting emotions already. He just wasn't ready to face this. 

...….. 

It was saturday night. Dae-jin clearly enjoyed his free time at home. He just ordered some of his favorite foods, started a film on the Tv and sat down on the couch with some alcohol in one hand. It was a perfect night. 

Well he thought that…

His mind was lingering somewhere in his current situation with Jae-hyun. However it wasn't just about him being too sensitive. He was just alone and disappointed that's all. 

Just as he was thinking about all this, his phone screen lit up in the dark room. 

His first thought was " Of course, all I had to do was think about him and he's already texting me." 

Only when he looked closely at the screen, he realized the message wasn't from Jae-hyun this time. 

The name on the screen made Dae-jin's breath hitch. 

[Min-woo]

Hey…I saw you recently around the university today. Didn't want to say hi, you looked like you were about to punch someone. You don't have to reply. Just…wanted to say it was weird seeing you again after so long. Also. Your hair's longer now. It suits you. 

He blinked at the screen. That dry, familiar tone – it hadn't changed at all. 

Min-woo

He was an old schoolmate, from before Dae-jin got accepted into this prestigious university. They hadn't spoken since. It had been at least a year since he last heard anything about him – after all that happened between them. 

Then one day, Min-woo decided it would be best if they didn't continue something that had barely even started. 

Dae-jin still remembered their last conversation. 

" We'll mess things up if we keep doing this "

Min-woo was the kind of person whose vision for his own future eclipsed everything else, Nothing mattered more – not even Dae-jin, as it turned out. 

So now..what the hell did he want? 

Dae-jin let out a frustrated yell into his hands as he pressed them against his face. 

" Great. Now I've got two guys harassing me. What's next? " - he thought. 

He remembered the last time they kissed – really kissed – Min-woo's hand lingered at the back of his neck a second too long. He thought that time: he's going to change his mind. But never did. 

Then he decided to write back against that. 

[Dae-jin]. You always pop up when I least expect it. 

A few seconds passed. It was almost too long for Dae-jin. 

[Min-woo]. Still the same, huh? 

Dae-jin smirked a little, it felt bitter. 

[Dae-jin]. No. I'm worse now.