The Eldrim Cards Legacy

Reveal Spoiler

The author’s writing skills have progressed since his previous work, The Innkeeper, particularly in that expectations set are upheld. The storyline and setting are great. The characters are decent and likable. However, the writing quality itself needs improvement. On the minor side, there are plentiful small grammatical errors, run-on sentences, and a notable amount of info dumping.  The work’s major flaw is the unnecessary, indirect, awkward, and abstract phrasing. This is particularly glaring in action scenes. Too often the MC’s direct senses are avoided or obfuscated. Instead, there is an uncalled-for post-analysis topdown view of events. It takes the reader out of the action.  Direct advice to the author: Please use direct phrasing. Write “It was this,” rather than, “He felt it was this,” or “He knew it was this,” or “It seemed like it was this.” Describe the MC experiences without processing them through a third party’s perspective. Avoid abstractions in fight scenes. Don’t write “Their fight, almost too fast for Nero to follow, seemed like a masterwork of a performance,” (quick example from chapter 9). Instead, write what is being sensed. For example, “A series of clangs rang out, as Invictus’s spear parried the colorful blur of magical sword attacks with masterful precision.” The second quote conveys similar information in a more detailed, direct, and exciting fashion. It gives us direct sound and sight without referring to Nero as the filter. This work could shine and garner greater popularity with an external editor or better self-editing that pays particular attention to the above flaws.

Mandatory shameless author review: this is an excellent book with an exceptionally handsome author- I mean main character. I put a lot of work into the world and story for this, and have every intention to maintain a high quality of work throughout. There will be some humour here and there, I literally cannot avoid it even if I wished, but the book will generally be much more serious and dark compared to my other work if you are familiar with it. Please do give this a try. I hope you like it!

I like book. I review book. More people read book, author writes even more book. I happy.

the story starts like the drawing of a painting, slowly adding color,yeti even in the early chapter we got a lot of plot points. I see some Connection between Grant and Lex, I hope he will bloom in a beatifull new character. Good luck author and great job so far.

I just the the Mcs trash character. 24/7 complaining and making his faults into the other parties fault while trying to justify himself on being the humiliated Victim in the case.😑🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

Everything is awesome thus far (chap 117)! Both of Lifesketchers novels are certainly like a breath of fresh air. Lots of engaging aspects. Small spoiler —-> Nero's way of thinking is espessialy interesting and conductive to personal growth.

This novel is exceptionally well made. The language flows well, the power concept is very original and it blends many genres together seamlessly. Nero is a very layered mc that avoids all the usual annoying mc tropes so far and has a genuine personality. The world is extremely interesting and the supporting characters are distinct and fleshed out. Easy five star.

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solid read, some sections of chapters are kinda info dumpy but other than that it's super good so far I really enjoy it

Très bon livre j'ai vraiment apprécié de le lire

I’m writing this review while the novel only has 26 chapters. The writing quality is great so far and the only complaint I have is that there aren’t more chapters yet. This isn’t this author’s first novel and with their other story they have shown that they can plan a good narrative and keep it interesting over time, so I have high hopes for this one as well.

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