Chapter 218: "The Eggnogpocalypse Begins"

Just when Kazuya thought he could finally rest after the Fruitcake Fiasco, the ground beneath him rumbled.

A thick, sickly-sweet mist oozed from the cracks in the earth.

Sylvara sniffed the air. "…Why does it smell like cinnamon and regret?"

Quackleton squawked in alarm. "QUACK QUACK QUACK!!" (Translation: WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE!)

And then—it rose.

A giant, swirling mass of creamy, yellowish liquid, glowing ominously with an unholy festive energy.

The Undead Eggnog of the Forgotten Holidays had awakened.

It bubbled and sloshed, forming a monstrous face in the shifting, gelatinous nog.

"FOOLS! YOU THOUGHT THE CURSED FRUITCAKE WAS THE END?! I AM THE TRUE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS!"

Kazuya blinked. "Wait, you can talk?"

The Eggnog Horror cackled. "OF COURSE! I WAS BREWED WITH THE SOULS OF A THOUSAND HOLIDAY DRINKS NO ONE ASKED FOR!"

Sylvara took a step back. "This is… beyond cursed."

The Eggnog's Ultimate Weapon

Without warning, the Eggnog Beast extended two frothy tentacles, grabbing a random NPC villager.

"NOOOOO—" the poor villager screamed—before being force-fed eggnog straight from the source.

A terrifying transformation occurred instantly.

The villager glowed, their body inflating slightly as their eyes turned eggnog-yellow.

They opened their mouth—

"Mmm, this actually isn't bad."

…And then promptly exploded into Christmas confetti.

Ravynne screamed. "HOLY SH—"

The Eggnog laughed again. "SOON, ALL SHALL KNOW THE SMOOTH, CREAMY EMBRACE OF MY FESTIVE MADNESS!"

Kazuya paled. "We have to stop this thing before it nogs everyone to death!"

The Battle for Sanity Begins

The Eggnogpocalypse had begun.

Eggnog minions oozed from the ground, forming weird little humanoid eggnog creatures with candy cane arms and sinister grins.

Sylvara immediately blasted a fireball at one—

It absorbed the flames and grew larger.

"OH COME ON!"

Kazuya turned to Ravynne. "Tell me you have a plan."

Ravynne pulled out a flask. "I do. It's called alcohol."

She chugged it and set the flask down dramatically.

Sylvara frowned. "How does that help?"

Ravynne hiccuped. "Dunno. But I feel braver now."

Kazuya groaned. "We're so screwed."

Quackleton's Noble Sacrifice (Sort Of)

The duck warrior, fearless and dramatic, stood on a rock.

"Quaaack!" (I shall face this unholy horror myself!")

The team watched in horror as Quackleton charged straight into the Eggnog Monster.

With a battle cry, he vanished into the creamy void.

For a brief, tragic moment, all was silent.

Then, the Eggnog Creature shuddered.

It violently convulsed.

And then—it spat Quackleton back out.

The duck landed with a wet plop, covered in thick eggnog.

He shuddered.

His eyes were hollow. His soul was broken.

"Quack…" (I have seen things…)

Kazuya gasped. "Oh my god, it's too much for him!"

Ravynne grabbed Quackleton and shook him. "QUACKY, NO! DON'T GIVE UP ON US!"

The duck trembled, eyes unfocused. "Quack…" (So creamy… so smooth… too much nutmeg…)

Sylvara wiped a tear. "We may have lost him."

Kazuya gritted his teeth. "No. We keep fighting!"

The Final Strategy: Spiking the Nog

Ravynne snapped her fingers. "WAIT. I HAVE A PLAN."

She rummaged through her endless stash of alcohol and pulled out…

A giant bottle of extra-strength whiskey.

Kazuya raised an eyebrow. "What… what are you gonna do?"

Ravynne grinned. "Simple. Eggnog is at its most dangerous in its purest form. But what happens if you SPIKE IT TOO HARD?"

Sylvara gasped. "You mean—?"

Ravynne popped the cork and yeeted the whiskey straight into the Eggnog Horror's swirling body.

For a moment, nothing happened.

Then—

The Eggnog Beast shuddered violently.

"WHAT… IS… THIS… POWER?!"

It gurgled, its body sloshing uncontrollably.

The whiskey spread through its system—and suddenly, the monster's movements became sluggish.

"I… FEEL… WARM AND FUZZY…"

The Eggnog Monster wobbled.

"Y'KNOW… MAYBE I'VE BEEN TOO HARSH… MAYBE I JUST NEEDA SIT DOWN FER A MINUTE…"

The Eggnog Monster began mumbling drunkenly, slurring its words.

"I JUST… WANT TO BE… LOVED… Y'KNOW? LIKE… NO ONE EVER FINISHES ME."

It hiccuped, and its entire body started evaporating.

Kazuya blinked. "…Did we just get it drunk to death?"

Ravynne nodded sagely. "A problem only alcohol could solve."

Sylvara sighed. "I hate that this worked."

The Eggnog Beast let out one final, drunken mumble—

"I love you guys… no homo…"

And then, it collapsed into a harmless puddle.

Victory (Somehow?)

The team stared at the remains of what was once an unstoppable festive horror.

Kazuya exhaled. "Okay. So that just happened."

Sylvara crossed her arms. "I need a vacation."

Quackleton, still traumatized, simply whispered, "Quack…" (I will never drink again.)

Ravynne dusted off her hands. "Welp! Another problem solved."

Santa appeared once more, stroking his long beard.

"You have done well, heroes. But beware… there are still other cursed holiday horrors out there."

Kazuya groaned. "Oh for the love of—WHAT NOW?"

Santa's eyes darkened.

"The Haunted Gingerbread House."

The team collectively screamed.

TO BE CONTINUED…