Rewriting Us
Author: chanman20
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Bobby Knight and Sophia Lancaster were born into money and bound by an unspoken promise—one made long before they could understand what it meant. Their families worked together to build an empire, their futures set in stone from childhood.
For years, they grew up side by side—best friends, and maybe something more. They spent summers together, shared family vacations, and teased one another through every milestone. But as time passed, so did the clarity of their connection. Was their bond real, or just another part of their parents’ carefully laid plans?
new to writing if you can't tell lol, but I promise it'll get better
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Its not a bad novel, but i can tell this is your first time writing. Quality is alright its not MTL so that's always a plus lol. I would work on your pacing. You can go into more detail with some stuff. The honeymoon felt rushed and you could have made it into 3-4 chapters and described it more. The mansion also felt rushed like here's a big house and some rooms and that's it. I get you wanna rush some things but I also feel like their childhood could have been fleshed out a bit more too. At least you try with your R18 stuff and not just here's a dick and pussy and she's squirting everywhere so props for that. Overall not bad just work on a few things and you could write something good
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Hello great author, I'm a huge fan of your work! Your book left a lasting impression on me, and I believe it has the potential to reach even more readers. I'd be honored to share some thoughts on how to enhance its impact and visibility. Would you be open to hearing my thoughts?