Re: Life - Business & Technology

Author here. Thank you guys for checking out and reading my first attempt at writing a novel. I would highly appreciate any feedback in the reviews and you are welcome to message me on webnovel about the novel. Thank you again!!

At the time of this review there's only 20 chapters, it won't be a detailed review but i will update later on in the novel. The writing quality is a 5/5 for me, there are grammatical mistakes and mistakes with the calculations but it's not to frequent within the novel, it noticable but won't ruin the experience. One example of these calculations errors is with the mc's mother. In one chapter his mother was said to make 50k a month while working as a secretary. I think you meant 50k a year as a month would be an over price. The pace of the novel dosen't feel to rushed and is a steady pace. The detail to character development and world background is doing great, the interaction with other characters comes of as natural and not awkward or unrealistic. overall I highly recommend reading this novel if you're into mc's building up their financial empire while only utilizing their future knowledge.

Writing quality is excellent. Wish i could for free though as i cannot read the rest. I like where this story is heading. The characters are memorable. World seems to be full of cool places and things, and the tech in use is fascinating. This guys novel has a website which you all should check out, full of art and graphics. you can tell they have put a lot of effort into it. Overall its a 10/10.

It has potential but ruined early 1 mc shifts to being 13 to quickly 2 mc focusing on bitcoin instead of other avenues of wealth 3 not clear on how much earned and how much spent ruins immersion 4 ex husband hired an expert yet a 13 year old defeated him easily without real expertise 5 not clear where set 6 illogical speed for earnings 7 why only focus on digital and not land etc 8 mc is multimillionaire yet you expect readers to believe he isn't getting more attention at school 9 mother follows everything he says because he says it 10 to many time skips

A solid idea unfortunately brought down by the the portrayal of the world and characters within it. It's fine to have a hyper competent MC but others must react accordingly; after the first game released there should have been interviews, TV appearances, the school would have literally thrown his face everywhere they could to say look how successful our students are. Whether it's his mother, friends, other students, the school, the media, or the world as a whole; literally everyone has failed to show an even slightly proportional reaction to any of his achievements. This story is by no means bad in terms of grammar, plot or structure, it simply fails to create a believable world and comes of as lifeless as a result.

no plot logic. why why why why why why why 😑 why why why why why why why why why 😑 why why why why why why why why why 😑 why why why why why why why why why 😑 why why why why why why why why why😑 why why why why why why why why why😑 why why why why why why why why why 😑 why why why why why why why why why 😑 why why why why why why why why why 😑 why why why why why why why why why 😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑

He (Brian_Gallacher) summarized my criticism very well so I'll just copy and paste it. It has potential but ruined early 1 mc shifts to being 13 to quickly 2 mc focusing on bitcoin instead of other avenues of wealth 3 not clear on how much earned and how much spent ruins immersion 4 ex husband hired an expert yet a 13 year old defeated him easily without real expertise 5 not clear where set 6 illogical speed for earnings 7 why only focus on digital and not land etc 8 mc is multimillionaire yet you expect readers to believe he isn't getting more attention at school 9 mother follows everything he says because he says it 10 to many time skips

It's not my cup of coffee. I like to read stories that have the premise with this story (the synopsis: time travel; MC male; Build country, kingdom, company...) ————————————————————— The writing quality is good ... good author work. The problem is MC and consequently the development of the story. In the story, the year is 2011 and MC is 13 years old. So, unexpectedly MC can create companies, games, programs ... BUT! It seems illogical to me that no one question MC, How can a child without education do technological, economic, legal jobs? In addition, MC has no legal problems to work and do business ... and that is illogical; his age (13 years) prevents him from doing all this, because the countries They make laws to prevent child labor ... according to the UN treaty, the member countries are legally obliged to protect children. Uffffff, well...

Reveal Spoiler

not a bad novel but has quite a few issues but my biggest is that mc has no setbacks, every industry he invests in somehow makes him money even when it doesn't rely on his future knowledge. his bodyguard turns out to be a cybersecurity expert . also how does a bunch of 13teen year old even focus and becomes experts in theri field, that was way to far-fetched

40 Chapters as of making this review. Reading the novel feels like a fever dream the world is weird since things from 2020 are appearing in 2012 the main character feels like hes just there to do a single thing and only that and its to improve technology. The snowball move was quite nice but kind of destroyed alot of plot. Also internet seems to fade in and out of existence its like its there for fillers and the next couple of chapters are just tech talk. nevertheless its an ok novel 8.5/10

Okay, this Is a story that really, really suprised me and I have to say it's one of the few gems in my books. . Maybe it's because it's free from meaningless faceslaps, and moronic scenes of senseless patriotism.... even if it's there, maybe it's just a different favorite that why I'm suprised. And thank God..in including different races and nationalities, instead of saying you hate foreigners like other Chinese novels . please update faster!

Overall is pretty good. The only thing that I didn't like about this novel is too much involvement in politics, especially in military affairs. But it's okay, I have an idea too. I hope he will install secret superweapons that nobodies know from the goverment on satellite. something like particle uplink cannon on the game of 'command and conquer generals' series. and an 'anti-gravity' bomb. for his forces. Antigravity has so many potentials. He should focus on that direction. Other than that is about romance, I think he needs to start dating his friend like Jessica 😅. it would make this novel more colorful. And there is one thing. he needs to search for some explanations for how he goes back on the past. Like for example the existence of a parallel universe where he was a genius and created a time machine and took pities on his parallel self so that one particular parallel self (which is him in this story universe) goes back on the past

I've caught up to chapter 123 as of this review. If you want a fast review then here it is. - This novel is like playing RUST or ARK on a 4x server, everything is sped up a lot from development and research to the creation of impossible tech, the creation of anything in this novel is VERY fast to the point of being impossible even 50 years down the line. Even the recruitment and training of people is INSANE. If you can live with that this novel is fantastic and you should read it. Now for the long review- WRITING QUALITY - grammar is good, mistakes would be hard to find, and his point tends to get across STABILITY Of UPDATES - I binged the first 122 chapters and there are only 123 chapters out so I cant really say if the releases are consistent but they look to be. STORY DEV - Other than the speed issue previously stated there are some other issued with the the way the story develops. The fist thing one will notice is that BITCOIN so far has been used as a I need money magic maker. In one chapter Bitcoin is 5$ then another chapter when the MC is 50 million in debt it is worth 80 and I don't even think a full month had passed since it was 5$. You see this again when he needs more cash a few months later and it is like 1000$. It all seems WAY to quick even with all the changes he makes to it. The next thing is the HIVE MIND being used as a magic make anything for a lower cost. The Development part of R&D is all done magically by the Hive Mind making the building of factories and production lines none existent. The research isn't much better ... Research is something that takes YEARS to even decades and they still may fail. But the MC can do it in months, basically if the MC can think of something it can be researched and developed in a MAX of 6 months. Author may say its because he employs the worlds greatest AI engineers or other scientist ect ect. But how is that even possible in the fist place? The MC asks someone to recruit people and all of a sudden within the week he has some of the best engineers and scientists willing to work for him simply because he has money. That's some SERIOUS MC aura going on there. There are some other examples of 4X speed issues, or MC aura making things work but this part is already too long. WORLD BACKGROUND - Not much to say since its just our Earth from 2011 with a sprinkle of butterfly effect and some baddies for the MC to completely be blind to or be bullied by while not being able to retaliate sense he cant find them. Its fine as world backgrounds go but also not surprising since its hard to mess up what already actually exists. Overall - ima keep reading and I also LOVE the photos and artwork he shows as concepts for the characters or tech. Makes it easy to visualize and understand and fun.

I like novels like this, I have also read Extraordinary Genius which is similar to this, so I was very excited to read it, but got disappointed really fast, MC starts with a poor family but is already talking about billions of $ in chapter 30s, colonising Mars etc, there is no struggle or steps to his success, it's 1 to 100 instantly nothing in between, somehow all his friends, classmate, and other employees that he hires when starting his business are top experts of the world, it's like you post a job ad and bill gates, Steve jobs, Elon Musk etc come to apply, He has reincarnated for less then a year but developed tech of 20 years ahead already, his R&D is crazy fast, no wonder author has to introduce aliens to keep up with MC.