The start is good but you should reread it before publishing. There seems to be alot of errors in your grammar or something like that. There are some literally words that repeated. But keep up the story and the characters design though.
7 years ago
2
FallacyPage
Shameless review here, thanks for the support although the way I write is full of errors it is nice to know many of you appreciate it, thanks guys.
The start is good but you should reread it before publishing. There seems to be alot of errors in your grammar or something like that. There are some literally words that repeated. But keep up the story and the characters design though.
Shameless review here, thanks for the support although the way I write is full of errors it is nice to know many of you appreciate it, thanks guys.