Firstly, I only made it to chapter 5.
I Must say that you did well on writing this fic, but. It wasn't for me, for starter's, it was Very very uncharacteristic for Ainz to do most of the things he did on the chapters that I have seen so far. And as far as I know Ainz is a Very Very cautious person bordering paranoia. So yeah that's that.
Secondly, the way he thinks and interact. that's what bothers me the most, as you have said in the early chapter that he has "Conquered" the new world. But he Acts as if he hadn't Conquered anything before, like he doesn't show the Overlord like ruler he is. instead he has this disconnect with his Overlord self, and from what I have read on the LN of Overlord, he has Fully accepted his Overlord self. And mind you he hasn't even completed his Conquest in the new world, but he already accepted his human self and his Overlord self. but in this fic it's a mess when you compare it to the current Ainz of the LN and this fic Ainz.
thirdly, I just genuinely dislike the way you're portraying him as a Subservient of sort in this Fic. I just don't ever see Ainz going that low.
btw I think I've seen this fic before in Fanfiction. don't know why I get the feeling like I've read it before, anyways it was a good run for me, sadly it's just not for me.
I hope this Review doesn't offend you in any way, if it do I apologise. have a nice day ^^/
4 years ago
38
TheOnlyRaiko
You made the alignment of ainโt neutral evil but instead of acting evil he is beta / good. Totally breaks the character for me...
5 years ago
25
AvatarLOK2
It is very interesting and gives me a side of Ainz that I never knew was there. It is honestly a new concept that I have never read before, Ainz in fate world. Good luck.
5 years ago
15
AshuraMikoto
ok imma be truthfull i wabted to give .a one star review because you totally destroyed everything ainz is and that is something i dont really tolerate anyway but i cant because youre grammar is good updating stability decent and world background acceptable anyway you now know my real opinion about this book
4 years ago
9
Aeternabilis
Okay so this novel for me isn't great as I love overlord and this isn't that. Everyone saying oh but he was human and if you take away nazarick etc then he was a nice guy.
Yes, he may be... however, we at least I didn't watch the show because he was a nice guy. I watched it because he was a badass, he had nazarick, his servants etc.
Basically, if you like cannon Ainz you won't like this story. He is a beta good guy... completely breaking his character tbh.
4 years ago
7
North670
It's decent fanfic and you should definitely try it out for yourself. However, I myself am not really up for this as the author makes Ainz out to actually care about strangers' feelings when he is undead and should be apathetic to them.
5 years ago
4
Kurowari_Da421
Dang, this **** is really good!! Now there's some who understands me!!! after all those years of searching some fate series that's actually good, now here it is!!! A GODDAMN GOOD FANFIC!!! AAHAHAHA!!!!
But to be honest, though, I would like to see Ainz and Shirou fights. fighting for Sakura. Will the hero wannabe ****er I going to win? Or is it the Overwhelmingly Overpowered God of Death?
..
..
Well, even if you don't do that, THIS SHIT IS STILL MOTHER FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!
5 years ago
4
SageBonks
Character butchering at its finest...
Character butchering at its finest...
Character butchering at its finest...
Character butchering at its finest...
Character butchering at its finest
2 years ago
2
Yakomi
I'm enjoying reading this novel so far. So author please don't drop this novel yet. The writing is not bad. I'm not good at giving opinion or review so don't mind me hehe. Good luck author!!!
5 years ago
2
Shadowuser_0112
Story is good, grammar could use some work. Not enough Overlord fanfiction. Thanks for writing one.
5 years ago
2
Servan
This isnt ainz ...........................................................
......................
..................................................
......
a year ago
1
Obligation
This would have been a good fic if you would have just wrote it as a SI, bc that is not Ainz bruh........................................................
3 years ago
1
UncleSheo
Author nothing offensive but it really is difficult to read, it feels weird but I can't quite point it out.
there are quite some unnecessary things, and the structure is, well, sorry to be blunt 'meh', It feels like google translated but with little Grammarly.
If you read ncode stories, then you'll understand what I mean, Rough structure.
Your content is interesting but hard to understand.
But your writing style and structure did improve exponentially since the beginning.
But don't worry about it much, it will come with experience.
Keep up the good works, and hopefully, you will take it positively to improve!
Firstly, I only made it to chapter 5. I Must say that you did well on writing this fic, but. It wasn't for me, for starter's, it was Very very uncharacteristic for Ainz to do most of the things he did on the chapters that I have seen so far. And as far as I know Ainz is a Very Very cautious person bordering paranoia. So yeah that's that. Secondly, the way he thinks and interact. that's what bothers me the most, as you have said in the early chapter that he has "Conquered" the new world. But he Acts as if he hadn't Conquered anything before, like he doesn't show the Overlord like ruler he is. instead he has this disconnect with his Overlord self, and from what I have read on the LN of Overlord, he has Fully accepted his Overlord self. And mind you he hasn't even completed his Conquest in the new world, but he already accepted his human self and his Overlord self. but in this fic it's a mess when you compare it to the current Ainz of the LN and this fic Ainz. thirdly, I just genuinely dislike the way you're portraying him as a Subservient of sort in this Fic. I just don't ever see Ainz going that low. btw I think I've seen this fic before in Fanfiction. don't know why I get the feeling like I've read it before, anyways it was a good run for me, sadly it's just not for me. I hope this Review doesn't offend you in any way, if it do I apologise. have a nice day ^^/
You made the alignment of ainโt neutral evil but instead of acting evil he is beta / good. Totally breaks the character for me...
It is very interesting and gives me a side of Ainz that I never knew was there. It is honestly a new concept that I have never read before, Ainz in fate world. Good luck.
ok imma be truthfull i wabted to give .a one star review because you totally destroyed everything ainz is and that is something i dont really tolerate anyway but i cant because youre grammar is good updating stability decent and world background acceptable anyway you now know my real opinion about this book
Okay so this novel for me isn't great as I love overlord and this isn't that. Everyone saying oh but he was human and if you take away nazarick etc then he was a nice guy. Yes, he may be... however, we at least I didn't watch the show because he was a nice guy. I watched it because he was a badass, he had nazarick, his servants etc. Basically, if you like cannon Ainz you won't like this story. He is a beta good guy... completely breaking his character tbh.
It's decent fanfic and you should definitely try it out for yourself. However, I myself am not really up for this as the author makes Ainz out to actually care about strangers' feelings when he is undead and should be apathetic to them.
Dang, this **** is really good!! Now there's some who understands me!!! after all those years of searching some fate series that's actually good, now here it is!!! A GODDAMN GOOD FANFIC!!! AAHAHAHA!!!! But to be honest, though, I would like to see Ainz and Shirou fights. fighting for Sakura. Will the hero wannabe ****er I going to win? Or is it the Overwhelmingly Overpowered God of Death? .. .. Well, even if you don't do that, THIS SHIT IS STILL MOTHER FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!
Character butchering at its finest... Character butchering at its finest... Character butchering at its finest... Character butchering at its finest... Character butchering at its finest
I'm enjoying reading this novel so far. So author please don't drop this novel yet. The writing is not bad. I'm not good at giving opinion or review so don't mind me hehe. Good luck author!!!
Story is good, grammar could use some work. Not enough Overlord fanfiction. Thanks for writing one.
This isnt ainz ........................................................... ...................... .................................................. ......
This would have been a good fic if you would have just wrote it as a SI, bc that is not Ainz bruh........................................................
Author nothing offensive but it really is difficult to read, it feels weird but I can't quite point it out. there are quite some unnecessary things, and the structure is, well, sorry to be blunt 'meh', It feels like google translated but with little Grammarly. If you read ncode stories, then you'll understand what I mean, Rough structure. Your content is interesting but hard to understand. But your writing style and structure did improve exponentially since the beginning. But don't worry about it much, it will come with experience. Keep up the good works, and hopefully, you will take it positively to improve!
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