Azrael : Angel of death

The story is fine but there is a lot of work that needs to be corrected to polish this novel. Your creativity and story telling is improving but I believe you need to work on a few areas to progress further: 1) Grammar, so far there is to much grammatical mistakes that break the flow of the novel ruining the immersion, I suggest after every post you go back to the start and fix a chapter or two, depending on your available time. 2) character development, so far the characters feel two dimensional. They don’t feel genuine or real. For instance the MC the one we’re first introduced too who reincarnated into the game. It feels like were always seeing someone else’s pov instead of live accounts from the character themself, their emotions feel forced and fake and their interactions dry and brief. You don’t take the time to build up their character or personality. The only times we see something is when he swears “F* you” or “F* this” a lot. 3) pacing, it feels the story is progressing too fast, some of the best novels in this genre are long and dragged on at the beginning, some spanning hundreds of chapters, why? It’s because we see the Mc in their most vulnerable time and when we finally see them at the top we know the struggles they went through to get there, here it feels everything is on a golden platter we don’t even get to feel the struggles and difficulties of when he played the game. We build no report or connection through this. The world building is interesting and you do shine in this avenue but the way you go about fitting the story into it needs work, I believe if you truly love your novel you would work hard to improve it, once it’s at a great level I’ll come back and provide a better review and delete this old one :)

I'm starting to love this novel , keep up the good work , the only problem is the grammatical errors but it is fixed quickly which is kinda impressive

I reviewed this novel five star just because it's not predictable like some novels have read , as a new author you surprised me with this novel, I'll like to see how it ends

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